Gid...Help Me Out

[Ian Hunt]

I knock impatiently on the door to Gid's flat.
No reply.
Just like him.
I knock again.
Nothing.
Typical, just when I really needed to talk to him.
I give up on knocking and apparate inside.
"Gid!" I call, "Come on man, help me out!"

[Gideon Prewett]

"Just come in then, Ian." I mutter from the kitchen. "I was going to open the door, you know."

[Ian Hunt]

"This century or next?" I say blankly, sitting heavily on the couch in his living room.

[Gideon Prewett]

"Whenever I was done..." I start to say, then notice his tone, and sit next to him. "What-...?" I stop again, then say quietly, nodding to his arms, "Ian, you're bleeding."

[Ian Hunt]

"Am I?" I say vaguely, glancing at my arms. "Oh."
I couldn't even remember cutting this time, but I'd obviously done it.
I couldn't really remember much about the last few hours actually.

[Gideon Prewett]

"Jesus...Ian." I groan quietly, getting up and walking into the kitchen, bringing out my wand and a couple of bandages.
Then kneel next to him, taking his wrist and starting to heal it patiently, "Man, you told me you'd stopped doing this. What happened?"

[Ian Hunt]

I look up at him, then look away again. "Erin-..." I start to say, but can't quite finish for the moment, just watching him heal my wrists.
I pause, managing to get a grip then say quietly, "Erin-...she-...she killed herself."

[Gideon Prewett]

I stop, staying silent for as long as I dare, then carry on healing him, but my hands are shaking slightly, "She-...wh-...? Ian, I'm sorry."

[Ian Hunt]

"She threw herself off the tower." I say quietly, becoming very interested in the floor. "I tried-...I tried to catch her, Gid...but she was...already falling..." I stop abruptly.

[Gideon Prewett]

I don't say anything, finishing putting the bandages over the near enough healed cuts. "We'll talk to Maddie about healing those for you," I tell him quietly, "She's a healer. She'll do a better job than me."
I can't really think of anything more to say, so I just sit round next to him again, in silence, looking straight ahead, just like he was.

[Ian Hunt]

"I don't want her to know about..." I say quietly, gesturing pathetically to my wrists. "Or the other times."

[Gideon Prewett]

"Okay mate. Our little secret." I say softly, not really sure if I should say something about Erin...or not.
"Do you know why....why Pip left us?" I manage to say.

[Ian Hunt]

I look at him, and nod slowly, but before I can say anything, my breath catches in my throat and my eyes start to sting so I just go back to looking at the floor.

[Gideon Prewett]

"Okay, mate." I say, clasping his shoulder lightly, "I'll just give you a minute, alright?" I say, standing up to go into the kitchen.

[Ian Hunt]

I nod gratefully, waiting until he's out of the room before putting my head in my hands, a tear rolling down my cheek, "Erin..." I say softly.

[Gideon Prewett]

I watch him for a moment from the doorframe, then turn away again, making use of myself by grabbing a couple of bottles from the fridge and taking my time opening them.

[Ian Hunt]

I pull myself together slightly, forcing myself to sit up, looking directly ahead, trying very hard not to think.

[Gideon Prewett]

"Firewhiskey...make it better." I say, going back into the room and handing him a bottle, then sitting down next to him again, knocking the cap off my own bottle and taking a swig.

[Ian Hunt]

I laugh bitterly, "Yeah, of course." But take the bottle anyway.

[Gideon Prewett]

"So, what's going to happen now?" I say softly.

[Ian Hunt]

"I-...I don't know." I answer honestly.

[Gideon Prewett]

I stay silent for a moment, "You're thinking about it this time, aren't you? Staying, for real? You're actually considering it, that's why you haven't already left."

[Ian Hunt]

"Yeah, I am." I nod slightly, "Imagine it. Me, of all people, actually settling down in one place." I force a weak laugh, "But I'm thinking about it Gid."

[Gideon Prewett]

I smile weakly, "You-...I think you should. You've got things alright around here, after all. A home, friends, maybe even a family someday. I know it's hard for you. To let go of the way you've been living for so long, and-...everything that's happened, but maybe it's time to just...like you said, settle down, if only for a bit."

[Ian Hunt]

"It is hard though Gid, that's the point. Last time I even thought about it was-..." I stop for a moment, then carry on, "Was with Erin, and look what happened there."

[Gideon Prewett]

"History doesn't always repeat itself. You can't live like this Ian. You can't live so terrified that something worse or the same thing is just around the corner, it's not living at all."

[Ian Hunt]

"I'm not scared." I snap, "I'm not scared and I'm not weak."

[Gideon Prewett]

"I never said you were, man." I assure him, "I know you're not...I know. But, okay, you want the trruth. I'm fucking scared fucking shitless. I don't know what's going to happen, but chances are I'm going to die. And I don't want to die. It's okay to be scared, man. You know that, don't you? It's okay to admit to being scared and to admit you're hurting, because you are, and that's fine, that's normal."

[Ian Hunt]

"Then I don't want to be normal! Or human! Or fine! I don't want to feel like this! And I am not scared! I'm not!" I say, raising my voice angrily.

[Gideon Prewett]

"Ian...Ian, look at me," I say calmly, putting my hands on his shoulders, "Look at me. Calm down, please. I understand. I do. You're in a fucked up place right now. I get it. But just calm down, okay?"