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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 30, 2007 23:27:08 GMT
i sat over at table by myself running my finger along the rim of the glass with my head resting on my hand.
got the tickets
paced everything
got the kids
looked at a few flats
i had everything ready for me to leave. to leave and never come back. but planning to leave and actually leave was another thing.
"dear god i need someone to help me....." i mutter still looking out into space. i moved one of my hands onto my stomach and sighed.
just waiting for someone to come. i'd take anyone at the moment.
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 1:39:39 GMT
"I'll help...if you let me." I mutter quietly.
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 1:41:43 GMT
i close my eyes and sigh. i nod my head but i can't look at him. "i'm sorry...." i say softly looking down
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 1:43:16 GMT
"No, I'm sorry." I say pulling up a chair.
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 1:47:49 GMT
"why are you sorry?" i ask, "andy told me that you had to leave and i'm ok now, wish you didn't have to but if you had to you had to. then i'm the one that messed everything up. we had it good. you me kim mia and brett. that was good. then i messed it up. then i got pregnant. then i didn't tell you. then i thought about leaving without telling you. which i'm not doing anymore." i say, "i'm the one who was running from you."
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 1:50:53 GMT
"I shouldn't have left without telling you, or I should have at least left a note." I say looking down at the table. "And getting pregnant wasn't your fault, condoms work only 98% of time. You were scared, I can understand that."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 1:53:52 GMT
"i'm terrified..." i say softly
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 20:24:46 GMT
"Yeah, kind of figured."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 20:59:35 GMT
i nod my head and look at him for the first time since we've been talking, but look away. "andy told me about babies." i say, "i didn't know they kicked."
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 21:29:15 GMT
"Really? You didn't? I did."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 21:37:25 GMT
"i thought that was a joke or something, or just something that my mum told me so i wouldn't go out and get myself preggers at 15 like she did." i say. "look sirius, you don't have to do anything. lin being the big mouth she is probably told you that her and i can hear other peoples thoughts, so i know a few things. i can make it with this kid on my own, hey my mum did it with me until i moved in with my dad," i say, "anyways. what i'm saying is i know the whole you wanting you to have a kid with a girl you love, and seeing as you don't love me i can just raise the kid on my own. i'm not gonna make you help me or anything. i can get the guys that i lived with to help me. i can do this is on my own." i say, "now you don't have to help me or anything. not if you don't want to. don't do this cos you think you have to or cos you think it's the right thing. do it cos you want to." i say
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 21:46:02 GMT
I put my hand lightly on her arm, making a mental note to kill Andy later,"Look Yumi, yeah this isn't how I planned on having my first kid, but I"m not gonna bail on you. I'm gonna stick with you through all this, and I'm gonna love this kid. I'm not going anywhere."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 21:50:13 GMT
i nod my head, "are you sure?" i ask looking up at him
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 21:54:02 GMT
"Yeah, I'm sure."
Half sure...but still
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 22:04:06 GMT
"might want to be careful what you think around me. normally i can block it out but i'm an emotional wreck so i can't do it at the moment." i mutter looking down.
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 22:06:18 GMT
I look down at the table ashamedly,"Sorry." I mumble.
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 22:11:03 GMT
"if that's how you feel i can't do anything about it." i sigh. "i should have kept my big mouth shut then we would be in this. if i never said that i had a thing for you then we wouldn't be in this situation. i should have kept my mouth shut..." i say softly
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 22:21:23 GMT
"And I sohuld have kept it in my pants." I say,"Look there's nothing we can do now except raise this baby. And that's what we're gonna do."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 22:23:16 GMT
i nod my head. "sorry in advanced for the next nine months."
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 22:25:51 GMT
"Hell I deserve it."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 22:32:00 GMT
i smile weakly and shrug. "so you and andy were serious when you guys said it kicks?" i ask, "i'm really dumb when it comes to babies. i can take kids, but babies are another thing."
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 22:40:33 GMT
"Yeah, the kick, least that's what I've heard."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 22:47:53 GMT
i groan and lay my head on the table. "you want that? i can't drink anymore." i mutter holding my stomach. "i can't do this...." i say softly
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 22:49:55 GMT
"It's better you quit anyways." I mutter singaling the bartender,"Oi! Two orders of pumpkin juice!" I yell then turn back to Yumi,"Yes you can, you gotta stop putting yourself down."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 22:57:49 GMT
"you wanna know my real name?" i ask with my head still on the table, "and i got a job here this morning." i say with a small smile
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 23:08:51 GMT
"Uh sure." I say,"Good job," I smile handing her the glass of pumpkin juice.
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 23:11:13 GMT
"it's amy." i say, "i didn't want that name though. my moms boyfriend named me that. hate him." i mutter "and thanks." i say and sit up but i get dizzy so i just put my head back on the table. "i'll drink it in a minute." i mutter
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Post by Sirius Black on Jul 31, 2007 23:17:26 GMT
I put my hand on her back, rubbing it soothingly,"Amy..that's a nice name." I smile,"Much better then Sirius."
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Post by Yumi Baker on Jul 31, 2007 23:22:43 GMT
i smile weakly, "thanks. and sirius isn't that bad of a name" i say softly but still stay down "i like my name but i don't want a name picked out by him." i mutter "she told me almost everyday since i was about eight that the only reason i had my name was because she didn't want me and didn't feel like naming me." i sigh, "you are the seond person i've told that so consider yourself lucky."
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Post by Sirius Black on Aug 1, 2007 17:01:17 GMT
I smile weakly,"Yeah, guess I am."
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