Memories

[Laken Maywood]

i stand at the front of the room, close to the casket, but not close enough to see inside it, fear of seeing her face, pale, and lifeless. silent tears run down my face as i stare blurily at the casket.
Why andra, she never did anything to anyone. i think to myself. She was always nice, and had so much ahead for her. i ad to my thoughts. i wipe away a few tears but they keep coming anyway. a memory triggers, the first day we meet.

"Mommy shes looking at me funny" i had said loudly
"I am not, your looking at me funny" she said, pulling her face away from her dad's leg and lookin at me suspiciously.
i glared slightly, but ended up laughing
"You're weeeeiird," she said.
i giggle and shrug "I'm a pumpkin!" i said
She sticks her tongue out at me.

another memory when we were 9
we were outside by a tree in my backtard i was sitting upside down with my legs up against the side of the tree and my back on the ground, andra was laying next to me
"Its a dragan" i said
"No its not, its a wolf" she said
"How do you get a wolf out of a dragan" i said
"How do you get a Dragan out of a wolf." she said back
i laughed "oh, i know, its a wolgan, or a draolf." i say
i laugh slightly at the memories, and cry even more.

[Andrew Foster]

I walk into the funeral home and swallow dryly, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat. It's early but I really don't have anywhere else to be, and maybe, if no one's in here, I can finally get up the courage to go look at my little sister.
So I look toward the front of the room, where the casket is, and jump a little in surprise to see a thin, tall, wispy sort of blonde girl standing there with her back toward me. I nod in recognition as the lump in my throat gets worse, and move up behind her to give her a hug from behind, pressing my face against her hair and closing my eyes.

[Laken Maywood]

more memories flood my mind as i try to build up enough courage to go up and look at her. i look down slightly, my eyes welling up with more tears as i make a few sobing sounds. i feel someone come up and hug me, and i turn my head slightly to see that its andrew. i nod slightly in rcognition, not wanting to say anything, just standing there.

[Andrew Foster]

I pull away after a moment and move around in front of her, holding onto her shoulders and looking at her closely. She'd been too upset to talk to anyone when I arrived the other day, and I wound up talking to some extremely pale, haunted-looking Chance kid instead. So this is the first time I've seen her since... before her brother's funeral, actually, since I'd been on a mission at the time.
The last time I saw her she was dancing to music inside her own head while eating watermelon at a joint family picnic. Andra had been next to her as if attached at the hip, rolling her eyes and calling out dire warnings, and occasionally breaking away to chase after some small child.
I shake my head to get rid of the memory and continue frowning at Laken... my sort-of little sister.
"You okay?" I ask quietly, knowing what the answer is but asking anyway.

[Laken Maywood]

i shake my head, "no, i'm not." i say my voice quiet, and my eyes looking at the floor. "Have-Have you seen her yet." i ask wiping my eye

[Andrew Foster]

Everyone asks that... why the hell does everyone ask that? I think, flinching. I glance behind me at my little sister's face, and actually manage to keep my eyes there this time despite feeling extremely sick. "Yes..." I say quietly. "Have you?" I ask, guessing the answer and trying to make her look at me.

[Laken Maywood]

"No, i don't....i don't want to." i say shaking my head repeatedly keeping my eyes fixed on the floor, afraid if i lift my head i will see her.

[Andrew Foster]

"It's all right," I say softly, pulling her into a hug again. "You don't have to."

[Laken Maywood]

i hug him back, crying into his chest. "I can't...i can't." i whisper "shes... gone." i say harly able to say it. "She cant be."

[Andrew Foster]

"Sh... sh..." I say, rubbing her back lightly, mildly weirded out at having a little girl crying into my chest but managing to overcome it with concern and shared grief. "She shouldn't be, I know. And I'm sorry."

[Laken Maywood]

i pull away slightly "How are you holding up." i ask knowing he feels terrible. i tuck some of my short hair behind my ear, and look up alittle glancing slightly at the coffin, feeling like i should go up and see her.

[Andrew Foster]

I look at her and very nearly smile, momentarily almost amused by those grown-up sounding words coming from such a perpetual five-year-old. "I'm all right," I shrug, not caring how obvious a lie it is.

[Laken Maywood]

"You lie." i say "I know you're not alright, Not at all. so just say your not alright instead of making an obvious lie." i say rubbing the back of my neck.

[Andrew Foster]

"Or maybe you should just not ask questions you already know the answer to," I say with a very slight smile, forgetting that I'm guilty of the same thing. "I'm relatively fine, how's that?" I ask, even though I'm really not.

[Laken Maywood]

I smile only slightly. "It's better." i say rubbing my eyes, Lack of sleep had made me extremely tired.

[Andrew Foster]

I nod. "And how about you? Relatively fine?" I ask, looking at her closely.

[Laken Maywood]

"Not Really, i don't think what i am feeling even has the word fine in it. More close to, extremely upset, and a little shaky." i say sticking my hands in my pockets, my expression was very grim, and you could see black puffiness under my eyes.

[Andrew Foster]

I wince, remembering a long-ago conversation with Jason after Laken had stood in my way in the hallway critiquing my appearance for five minutes straight.
”Brutally honest little munchkin, isn’t she?”
He laughs, ruffling her hair fondly. “Yeah… LakeLake’s too pure of heart to ever lie to anybody, even if she’s mean about it.”
I snort. “Wish my little sisters were pure of heart.”
“Brutally honest, eh, LakeLake?” I ask with a slight laugh, not knowing what else to say.

[Laken Maywood]

I smile remembering the memory,when i criticized him. "Your nose still isn't strait, and your eyes are to far apart." i joke "Yes very brutal."

[Andrew Foster]

I laugh very slightly, forcing a smile and ruffling her hair for a moment. "I can't believe you remember that. Must've been...." I think it over. "Well, okay... maybe eight. Tiny though."

[Laken Maywood]

i laugh slightly"Really? Eight, jeez it seems longer." i say. "I feel older, there has been so much stuff inbetween." i say

[Andrew Foster]

I laugh hollowly, nodding. "That there has." Death, destruction... dad and mum and Andra.. even Damion. Chris, on her end. Ellie's... illness. War and separation....
A little voice remains me that there's also been good things - her little sisters Lillian and Madeline... my little sister and nephew... etc. But I'd rather stick with the bad things, thank you very much.

[Laken Maywood]

lots of things have happend, Andra's nephew, and my little sisters, Ariel coming back.
Ellie's illness, chris dieing, now ellies terrified to touch anything, andras mom dieing, and her dad. i could feel tears starting to brim my eyes, i look down trying not to cry

[Andrew Foster]

"Some of them good," I say gently, glancing over noticing the tears in her eyes. "Not everything's been bad, right? And it'll... it'll be okay." It's hard to get those last few words out, glancing at Andra's casket, but it feel;s like they should be said, and maybe they're actually true.

[Laken Maywood]

i od my head, "Yeah, some good." i say "Not all bad." i say my voice cracking slightly.
"It sure doesn't feel that way." i say wiping my eyes with my palms. God i hated crying right now.

[Andrew Foster]

No, it really doesn't.
I shake my head, not saying anything.
She's not supposed to be here.... She's supposed to be an auror, riding muggle motorcycles. Supposed to throw a party when we all get out of hiding, and make herself sick eating blue and red icing straight from the tube like Ariel said she could. She's supposed to live longer than I do... not six years less, at least.

[Laken Maywood]

i just stand there, not saying anything, not thinking anything, just staring at the casket that my best freind lies in. your not suposed to be here

[Andrew Foster]

I glance over at Laken and notice her staring at the casket with a pained look on her face, so I reach out and give her a sideways hug.
"It's going to be all right," I say again, softly.

[Laken Maywood]

i just sigh slightly rub my eyes with the heel of my hand. "Yeah," i smile a weak half force smile, "It'll be alright." i say taking a letter out of my pocket and walking forward putting it on top of her hands my goodbye letter

[Andrew Foster]

I watch her a little uneasily as she walks forward and puts what looks like a letter in the casket, trying to decide if I should ask about it or not.