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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 20:30:49 GMT
i sat on the first row. gideons body was laying in a coffin just a few feet infront of me. i was the only one there at the moment and it was only a matter of time before everyone started coming. i had left charlie and bill with my mum and dad seeing as they refused to come to the funeral. i heard footsteps behind me and when i turned i saw............
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Post by Angel Simons on Jul 21, 2007 20:33:08 GMT
"I'm sorry I didn't save you, Gid," Angel whispered, walking up behind Molly.
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 21, 2007 20:33:12 GMT
I take a seat at the back of the funeral, feeling half like I was intruding, half like I should be here, feeling uncomfortable in my smart clothes, knowing Gid would probably have preferred it if everyone had come in jeans.
I sigh slightly, not wanting to glance up at the body in the open coffin at the front.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 20:36:12 GMT
i see angel and nod my head as if saying hello. she was gideons friend so she had to come. no matter what was going on between us. i see charlie sitting in the back. "i feel so weird. gideon would have wanted us in normal clothes and not this crap we in." i say with a bitter chuckle sitting next to charlie "thanks for coming"
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 21, 2007 20:39:15 GMT
"Couldn't stay away, could I?" I force a weak smile, "You're right. He wouldn't have wanted one of these formal things."
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 20:41:45 GMT
i put on a weak smile and nod. "it felt like the right thing to do." i sigh, "i wish i could have done what he wanted, but.." i say
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 21, 2007 20:45:41 GMT
"Yeah, I know." I sigh, "He said he wanted people to dress up as clowns for his funeral once...I'm not quite sure what a clown is...muggle thing, I think...and I'm pretty sure he was kidding." I laugh slightly at the memory, feeling guilty almost immediately for laughing at a funeral.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 20:48:23 GMT
"yeah clowns are something mugles like to make fun of. they wear a lot of make up, with white faces big red noses shoes that are huge and really crazy clothes." i chuckle, "and he told me that once to." i say laughing softly with him
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 21, 2007 20:49:29 GMT
"I think I just stared at him. And he clapped me on the back and said never mind lightning let's go get pissed." I smile slightly, "God, miss him awful."
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 20:53:13 GMT
"yeah. i miss him a lot to. dear lord when i thought i had lost them the first time, well i took it a lot worse than i am right now. my hands started shaking nonstop and i took up drinking." i say
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 21, 2007 20:54:01 GMT
"None of that this time, eh?" I clip her lightly on the chin, "Stay strong, won't you?"
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 20:59:11 GMT
"i'll try." i say "the drinking i can't and won't. i want more kids." i say, "but my hands have already started to shake." i say taking my hands out of the pokects of my coat. they were skaing a bit, but not as much as before. "it was worse before i came." i sigh
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 21, 2007 21:06:23 GMT
I take her hands in mine, in a friendly way, trying to stop them shaking, "You got it pretty bad there, Molly." I sigh slightly.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 21:11:09 GMT
my hands were shaking in his but it calmed me down. "well if i've coped before i can cope now." i sigh looking down with my hair falling in my face. "no matter how much i dn't want to, i've got to..." i say softly
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 21, 2007 21:14:58 GMT
"Yeah, it's like that sometimes." I sigh slightly, dropping my gaze.
Charlie, man. This is important. There's a file, in my appartment, slid under the fridge, I keep it there for safety. It's the assignment I'm working on for the Order, right up your street. When I'm gone-and don't say it cos I know I will be soon-please take over that assignment. It's important and I wouldn't trust anyone with it but you because I know you can do it. Please.
"I don't understand." I say softly under my breath in response to my train of thought rather than to the conversation.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 21:21:37 GMT
"don't understand what?" i ask
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 21, 2007 21:23:55 GMT
"Gid...strangest request. I got an owl. Instructions. Strangest request. Wanted me to take over an assignment for the Order for him. Simple enough but I don't know why it's so important to him. It's not important right now though." I sigh, looking back to the front where the open coffin was.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 21, 2007 21:29:18 GMT
"gid always had his reasons." i say, and see him looking at the coffin, "i had asked them to have it closed. but they left it open." i sigh, "you know you don't have to keep holding onto my hands. i'm pretty sure having two hands from a mental women shaking inside yours isn't something you enjoy." i say with a small smile
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Post by Charlie Owens on Jul 22, 2007 9:36:02 GMT
"You'd be surprised..." I joke weakly, but let go of her hands, "Sorry."
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 22, 2007 12:40:48 GMT
"it's ok. you were trying to help," i smile "but theres not much you can do."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Jul 22, 2007 15:56:09 GMT
I walk slowly and quietly into the room, holding Kim's hand. I paused briefly to look down at my casual white dress. I knew Gid wouldn't have wanted everyone in black for his funeral, so i had chosen to do the opposite.
I look up to see Molly, Angel and Charlie already here. I nod briefly to them politely, not wanting to be rude, but felt like i couldn't talk to them right now, not yet, i needed to see him first.
I squeeze Kim's hand lightly before continuing to walk towards Gid's coffin, only stopping a few inches away, looking down at what looked like his sleeping figure. I raise my other hand and place it gently on his face. "I miss you." I say softly, unable to get anymore words out from the lump in my throat. Although i wanted to say so much more.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 22, 2007 18:59:49 GMT
"i'll be right back.." i say to charlie and walk over to izzy. i didn't say anything, not sure if she wanted to talk yet or not.
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Post by Isabella Knox on Jul 22, 2007 19:15:08 GMT
I stand silent for a moment, stroking the side of his cold cheek with the tips of my fingertips. I reach down and pick Kim up carefully, balancing her on my hip. "Your daddy was such a brave man Kim, he loved you so much. He didn't deserve this, he shouldn't be here." I told her softly, looking into her wide innocent eyes before looking back down at Gid. "Daddy." I heard her whisper. "Goodnight daddy."
I felt hot tears prickle in my eyes, leaning my head on hers. "He loved us Kim, and we love him too, so much." I say quietly, letting the warm saltly tears run down my cheeks and come to rest on my lips.
I hear footsteps behind me and turn to see Molly walk towards me. I force a weak smile, even though i knew she wouldn't buy it. She was hurting too.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 22, 2007 19:20:24 GMT
i smile back. just as forced. just as fake. i walk over next to her and kiss kims forehead. "hey there kim..." i say softly. "you know, i'm not sure if you know me very well but i'm your aunt molly." i say to her softly. "hey izzy.." i sigh. "i don't think that i'm gonna get through this izzy.."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Jul 22, 2007 19:26:07 GMT
I shake my head silently, looking down at the floor for a few moments before looking back up at Molly. "I don't think i am either Molls. When i don't think about it, all i can feel is the emptiness, the numbness of it all. But when i do, it's the worst pain in the world." I explain, letting the tears cascade silently down my cheeks. "Every time i think about it, about him, about Fay, about Matt. It feels as if all my insides are being torn out of me, so i try and block it out again and i'm just left numb. I don't know which is worse."
I turn, looking down at Gid and letting out a painful sob, using my free hand to cover my now closed eyes, unable to keep my crying silent.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 22, 2007 19:39:44 GMT
when she calls me molls i stiffen up. gideon always called me molls. i nod my head looking down but then i hear her cry out. i take kim slowly from izzy and rub her back letting izzy cry. i use one hand and rub izzys back, crying but not as much as her. i couldn't cry. i didn't want to cry. no matter how much i knew it would help i wouldn't let myself. "everything will be ok. maybe not now. maybe not in a year, but it will in time. and i know time sucks, but we have to keep on living. no matter what. you've got kim. i signed over legal guardianship yesterday for kim. she's your now for good.." i say hoping that it might help her out a bit.
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Post by Isabella Knox on Jul 22, 2007 19:59:10 GMT
As soon as i feel her take Kim out of my arms i lean forward, putting my arms around Gid's still body, leaning my head on his chest letting out painful, raw sobs, unable to stop myself completely falling apart. See his still body, his closed eyes, feeling his cold skin. I wince as i hear my sobs echo around the large, almost empty room.
I bit my lip for a while, to listen to Molly, wanting her words to make me feel better. Wanting them to stop the pain.
"Thank you." I reply as she tells me that i'm now the legal guardian of Kim.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 22, 2007 20:10:40 GMT
i nod my head serching my mind to try and think up something to make her feel better, but i was still mourning. i wasn't in a place to try and help people with that. i hold kim close to me and let a few tears roll.
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Post by Isabella Knox on Jul 22, 2007 23:49:15 GMT
As soon as i'd finished saying thank you i felt the tidal wave of pain and grief hit me again, i turned my head so i was looking up at his face, trying to control my sobbing. "I love you." I say in a quiet shaky voice. "Always have, always will." I pause trying to find the right words. "Right now, i don't feel i could ever be happy again. It feels like i've lost the emotion altogether. Everything just feels so wrong with you gone, you should be here with me and Kim. You and Fay and Molly, you're like the three musketeers. Molly needs you both so much, and so do i." I pause again, looking up and giving Molly another strained smile.
"I've never felt so empty now, so incomplete. that is, when i'm not feeling the pain, the loss. It feels like you, Fay and Matt have taken half of me with you." I finish quietly.
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Post by Molly Weasley on Jul 23, 2007 10:51:04 GMT
i walk over next to izzy and sigh, "i do need you gid.." i say softly and grab his hand. it wasn't grabbing back like it used to. and it wasn't pulling me towards him so he could hug me because he knew the only time his little sister grabed his hand was when she was really in deep. i ope my mouth to try and say something but just a sea of stuttered incohearent words come out
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