indecision

[Trisha Patricks]

I stand outside the offices of the Daily Prophet, debating with myself so much I've started to pace back and forth.
And what were you thinking of writing? 'Squib seeks information on a younger witch sister... if she's still alive and not a deatheater by now, please contact wandless waitress....' Why would Arden even want to talk to me anymore? If she's still alive? And if she hasn't changed? You abandoned her and... what if mum and dad see?
That thought stops me cold, shivering with terror at the thought of them finding me.
But what if she's alive, and hasn't changed? Won't she want to see me and find out that I'm okay? Just like I want to see her and find out that she's okay?
This thought really has a point, although so do the others.... I press my fingers to my forehead, making myself think as I continue to sway back and forth, turning in circles on the sidewalk.
Either buy an ad or not. Go to Hogwarts or do not... just make a damn decision.
But it's easier said than done.

[Andrew & Ethan Leone]

"I told you they wouldn't put that advert in there," Ethan remarked to his brother as he pushed open the door to the Daily Prophet, holding it open so Andy could leave first.
"It was worth a try," Andy replied, grinning slightly.
"Hardly," Ethan snorted, "No one in their right mind is going to print a missing advert for your left sock."
"Which was why I was hoping they wouldn't be in their right minds, duh." Andy grinned even wider, then said to a girl outside, "They're sockist in there, so if that's what you're after then they won't do it."
Ethan yanked on the collar of his brothers shirt, "Can you behave yourself for once?"

[Trisha Patricks]

Just make a damn decision... make a damn decision.... I twirl on the sidewalk, stopping abruptly and dropping my hands from my face as I realize people are coming out of the building having a strange conversation. I frown slightly as one of the two uses the word 'sockist.'
"I... er... thank you," I say, puzzled, glancing between them. "I guess I'll keep that in mind." I make as if to walk into the building, then stop as I realize that I still haven't decided.
Wait until they're gone, then resume your pacing.

[Andrew & Ethan Leone]

"Anytime!" Andy smiled brightly.
"Sorry," Ethan apolgised on his behalf, steering his twin in the other direction but Andy slipped away from him and bobbed back up in front of the girl, "Need any help? You look confuzzled."

[Trisha Patricks]

"Uh... no, I'm fine," I say, stepping back a bit, still frowning slightly. "Just... trying to make a decision about... placing an ad." I shrug very slightly. "Thank you for your help."

[Andrew & Ethan Leone]

"But we didn't help..." Andy protested.
"Sorry, he can't pick up hints when people don't want to talk to us..." Ethan apologised again, yanking on his brothers forearm to try and get him to follow, "Come on lummox..."

[Trisha Patricks]

I smile very slightly at the sockist one's earnestness. "No, it's fine. You just startled me a little. And... thank you for the offer, I meant. But... I really have to think this on my own."
I think. Maybe it would help if I explained it to somebody other than myself....
I glance over at the building warily and let out a long sigh.
And maybe I'm a coward who will do nothing by default.

[Andrew & Ethan Leone]

"Sometimes when you want to sort something out in your head, saying it out loud can help, you know. And if you pretended you were talking to us you might not look crazy by saying it out loud," Andy smiled.
Ethan gave up on trying to get his twin to move and just hung back a little.

[Trisha Patricks]

I hesitate a moment longer, then nod. "Well, all right. If you really don't mind...." I say uncertainly.

[Andrew & Ethan Leone]

"We're here to help!" Andy smiled, "Spill your guts. Well, actually, first just so you know, I'm Andy, that's Ethan."
"Hi," Ethan smiled slightly.

[Trisha Patricks]

"Trisha," I nod, relieved not to have to try and give my last name when I'm not really sure what it is.
I take a deep breath. "And... well... you see, I'm trying to find my little sister," I start explaining in a low, calm voice. "I haven't seen her in six years, but if she's still alive then she's probably at Hogwarts. I tried going to the Ministry, but they said that Squibs don't have the right to access Wizarding records, so I doubt they'll let me find out where Hogwarts is. And if I take out an advertisement in the Prophet, I'm afraid my parents will see it. And I don't want to get her in trouble."
I shrug, a little embarrassed to have displayed my incompetence to others, but relieved that it's all out of my system.

[Andrew & Ethan Leone]

"We can help..." Andy said after a moment.
"We can?" Ethan muttered.
"Yeah..." Andy said under his breath to his twin, "We have access to all that sort of thing...Order records too. And we work at the ministry for fucks sake, we could get hold of all sorts of stuff..."
"And risk losing our jobs?"
"Worth it..." Andy replied.
Ethan considered for a moment, then nodded slightly, "So worth it."
Andy smiled at Trisha, "Well, we've come to the conclusion we can help if you're willing to accept our help. We can get to files, and Hogwarts, we might even know your sister already. We know a lot of people. What's her name?"

[Trisha Patricks]

I raise my eyebrows in surprise as the nicer of the two says that they can help, hover there uncertainly while they confer, and then smile genuinely at the more concrete offer.
"Her name is Arden Patricks," I say in such an excited rush that I forget to be paranoid. "And thankyouthankyouthankyou," I add, beaming at them.
Even though she won't want to see you? Or is probably dead?
I bite my lip, shaking my head at the voice as my smile twitches up again at the thought that I'm so close to finding out for sure.