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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 2, 2007 19:31:39 GMT
"Izzy," I say quietly. "It hasn't been going so well. The talking to him. All that happened was that he got angry and I got angry and we said some...some bad things." I pause. "Just tell me now, do you love him? If you do, I'll go back up there and I'll try again and I won't leave or give up until I've got through to him. If you don't, then I'll still go up there and try and talk to him again, but I don't know how long I'll be able to keep it up."
I shake my head bitterly. "There's no getting through to people like him. But I'll try for you, if you really want me to."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 2, 2007 19:38:07 GMT
"I think i do Rem..." I say softly "...I think i love him, but you don't have to talk to him." I continue. "What has he said?"
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 2, 2007 19:40:04 GMT
I shake my head again, looking firmly out of the window, my knuckles white because I was gripping the window sill again.
"I'll try then." I say quietly, chosing to ignore her question.
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 2, 2007 19:52:13 GMT
"You don't have to. You shouldn't be dragged into this" I say quietly placing my hand carefully on his shoulder.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 2, 2007 19:56:11 GMT
"It's already my business. Sorry, but that's how I feel. He's my friend, you're my friend. And it's a personal thing. This is something I know about, something I feel strongly about. And even if I wasn't going to be dragged into this, he made sure I was. Now, it's definitely my business, Izzy." I say bitterly. "You didn't hear him. The things he was saying-...the way he was saying them-...He dragged me into this."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 2, 2007 19:58:05 GMT
"What did he say Rem?" I ask quietly letting how scared i was of the answer show in my voice.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 2, 2007 19:59:27 GMT
"Lot's of things." I say evasively. "It doesn't even matter. I should go now, I'll go and see if I can get any further, you know, trying to get through to him."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 2, 2007 20:06:33 GMT
"You don't have to do this for me Rem." I say faintly
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 8:58:07 GMT
"Izzy, he doesn't deserve you, you're way too good for him." I say firmly, "But if you love him, then I'm going to do my best because you're my friend and I know what you're going through right now and I want you to have some happiness right now."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 15:29:20 GMT
"Thank you Remus." I smile slightly. "Did he say something really bad to you?" I ask softly.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 16:12:30 GMT
"Nothing I haven't heard a million times before." I say bracingly, trying not to let on how much hearing it from Sirius had hurt.
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 16:13:47 GMT
"What did he say?" I ask again nervously.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 16:15:36 GMT
"It's not important." I force a smile. "I just don't know if I'll be able to face him again for a little while. Maybe, tomorrow. I'll talk to him tomorrow."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 16:17:18 GMT
"Whenever you want." I say seeing through his false smile. 'What had Sirius said to upset Remus so much' i wondered.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 16:21:50 GMT
I look away from her.
I hoped she would never have to hear any of the things Sirius had said.
I hoped so much she would never have to hear it.
But the chances of being what she was, what we both were, and never having to hear that phrase, that name, that insult, weren't high.
Hopefully she'd never hear it from someone close to her.
I could hope that much.
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 16:25:07 GMT
I see him turn away. "You and Sirius are still friends though right?" I ask. I didn't want them to hate each other, if it hadn't been for me everything would be perfect.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 16:26:23 GMT
"We've never been real friends." I sigh. "I see that now."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 16:29:50 GMT
"Don't say that, you marauders are usually joined at the hip." I say
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 16:40:48 GMT
"Yeah, not anymore." I say, my voice had taken on a hollow and distant quality but I didn't know how to get rid of it. "I don't want to be a Marauder anymore."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 16:43:03 GMT
I stood still and shocked, what on earth had Sirius said to stop Remus from wanting to be a marauder. "Why?" I ask so quietly i could barely hear it myself.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 16:51:10 GMT
I shrug. "I'd rather not have anything to do with them for a while. He said somethings Izzy...Awful things about you, about me, about people like us. He doesn't want me around and I don't want to be around him. But you do, so I'll stomach him for all the time it takes to get him to stop being a jerk and that'll be it."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 16:54:07 GMT
I realise what Sirius had said "Remus he didn't call you....he didn't call us.....that word.....he wouldn't would he?" I ask, hoping against hope that Sirius hadn't called us.....that hateful word.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 16:55:21 GMT
I swallow, looking directly ahead.
I didn't want to answer.
But I didn't want to lie.
"Yeah." I say so quietly it's wonder she heard me.
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 17:00:02 GMT
I sink to the floor not being able to hold my own weight anymore. I hugged my knees and rested my forehead on them crying silently. I had been kidding myself, how could anyone love a half-breed like me. But how had he said it to Remus, what an awful thing to say to your best friend, i thought and cried harded.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 17:04:35 GMT
I sank down beside her and put my arm around her shoulder.
"Come on Izzy, don't cry." I say softly, trying not to cry myself. "We know we're not...what he said. We know and that's enough."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 17:07:38 GMT
"Why would he say such a hateful word Rem, why would he say that to you, one of his best friends." I say timidly.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 17:28:49 GMT
"Because-..." I pause. "because he was angry. He was trying to hurt any way he could so he called us that word. Said I always had been one and he'd never noticed it until just then. Said he was too good for you. He's not though." I say firmly. "If anything, you're way too good for him. He doesn't deserve you, Izzy."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 3, 2007 19:07:12 GMT
"He said that?" I ask softly. "Maybe you're right Rem, but it doesn't stop this ripping feeling in my chest." I finish.
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Post by Remus Lupin on Apr 3, 2007 19:14:02 GMT
"It wouldn't." I sigh heavily. "Izzy, I don't get it. He's not like this. He's never been like this before. A couple of days ago he was telling me he was worried that he liked you in a more than like kind of way. Which is as close as Sirius is going to get to saying love. I don't understand why this should change so much. This isn't how Sirius is. It's not like him."
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Post by Isabella Knox on Apr 4, 2007 17:33:57 GMT
"He said that?" I ask timidly. "Maybe he was too shocked to be able to say anything else." I sigh.
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