Alone{Fitzy}

[Riley Pearson]

I shook my head slightly again, letting out a shaky breath. "Aren't you upset at all?" I asked him, looking up to see, he seemed fine.

[Fitzy Patricks]

I shrug, very slightly, thinking over replies for a moment. "Maybe... more guilty than anything else," I say, going with a half-truth. "I was supposed to protect her."

[Riley Pearson]

"I could say the same thing.." I say quietly.

[Fitzy Patricks]

I shake my head, looking up from the floor. "You couldn't have done anything. Did you even know she was in trouble?" The way I did 'cause I was the trouble?

[Riley Pearson]

I shook my head, ".. No.. I didn't know anything was wrong." I say sadly, wiping more tears away after they fell.

[Fitzy Patricks]

I nod. "It's possible neither did she...." I say quietly. "There wasn't much that anyone could do, really."

[Riley Pearson]

I rubbed my forehead and sighed shakily as I sat there. "How'd you know?"

[Fitzy Patricks]

I look over at him quickly, guilty conscience jumping into overdrive again. "That... anything was wrong, you mean?" I ask, trying to give myself thinking time. "I... heard things." My hand goes half-sub-consciously but half-deliberately to the Dark Mark.

[Riley Pearson]

I shook my head, "I meant That was there was nothing anyone could do." I said swallowing slightly, trying to hold back tears. "Heard things? So why didn't you do something? W-Why didn't you help her?"

[Fitzy Patricks]

Because I was the one trying to kill her!
I shake my head, afraid for half a second that I may have actually said that and pretty sure that I've gone pale again anyway in the face of his accusations.
"I- I tried!" I protest. "Just... not hard enough. And I knew what she was up against and... there was nothing you could have done, trust me. Nothing most people could have done."

[Riley Pearson]

I look down and shake my head slightly, feeling kind of bad after I realized what I may have just put the blame more on him.

[Fitzy Patricks]

I'm a little surprised when he doesn't respond, as I was subconsciously preparing to argue some more, so I don't quite know what to say or do now. The urge to confess isn't getting much better, and I have the feeling that I better get out of here before I give in.

[Riley Pearson]

Sitting in the silence, I start to feel even sicker as I realize that she's gone. Looking over slightly to my side where I had sat with her once, makes my heart ache and I shook my head; the memory so vivid it was like she was sitting there next to me again, holding onto that spider, laughing. After a few moments of holding back my tears, I gave in and let them fall down my face again.

[Fitzy Patricks]

Oh, fuck... not this again.
I squeeze my eyes shut and turn away, unable to look at him or that stupid urge to confess gets even stronger. I also have a sudden urge to see inside his head, mystified by this reaction. The Arden that I knew was stubborn and unfriendly, hardly ever speaking except to let loose cutting insults. Clearly, that was not all there was to here, unless this Riley guy has strange taste in friends.

[Riley Pearson]

I let out a shaky breath and close my eyes leaning my head back against the wall, not having enough strength to cry anymore, but still having a few tears running down my face. I felt empty and alone even though Fitzy was standing right there, still wondering why he didn't seem that upset.

[Fitzy Patricks]

I glance over at him after a moment, frowning slightly at how hard he's taking the news. I've managed to block off most of my own feelings about it, except for the guilt, but even at its worst I never feel quite that bad.
"You seem... quite upset," I say after a moment.

[Riley Pearson]

I look over at him and raise my eyebrows slightly, "How could I not be? Arden was my best friend next to Riyann... Now they're both gone." I say shaking my head slightly, wiping off my face again.

[Fitzy Patricks]

"Sorry." I shake my head, still frowning at him slightly. "I didn't... I don't know. It's just a surprise that anyone would care all that much."

[Riley Pearson]

"How is that surprising?" I asked slightly taken aback.

[Fitzy Patricks]

I shrug a little, shaking my head. "I guess you knew a different person than I did, then. I never really expected.... I thought more people would probably be secretly relieved when she was gone than anything else."
This is a bit of an overstatement, and sounds a little harsh, but I don't correct it.

[Riley Pearson]

I shake my head and rub it a little bit as I sat there. "I guess I did. I just can't imagine someone being relived after someone's dead. You're really relieved that your sister's gone?" I asked looking over to him, surprised I was getting all of this out.

[Fitzy Patricks]

I shake my head quickly in automatic denial. "Not... not exactly. Not...." I can't say not at all, so I just stop. "I'm just... surprised. The Arden that I knew wasn't a pleasant person to be around, and I can't figure out why it would bother you so much."
You are digging your own grave here, Fitzy.

[Riley Pearson]

"Because she was my friend!" I say almost yelling, something that I didn't do too often, "Why's that so hard to believe?" I asked shaking my head slightly, then realizing he had already told me.

[Fitzy Patricks]

Because I don't want it to be true! I close my eyes again briefly, trying to calm down.
"We didn't get along, all right? I... fine. I guess she was a better person than I ever gave her credit for and I'm sorry!" Part of me wonders why the hell I'm shouting apologies at him, but the rest believes it's necessary and won't let me keep my mouth shut.

[Riley Pearson]

I flinch faintly as he starts yelling and nod my head slightly, not knowing what to say as he apoligizes. I guess I can see why he's saying sorry, but in another way, it's not like it was his fault.
".. Sorry.." I mumble looking away from him. "And she was."

[Fitzy Patricks]

I shake my head, somehow getting angrier at him for apologizing... unable to handle the guilt.
"You have nothing to apologize for," I mutter to the ground, eyes closed and fists clenched.

[Riley Pearson]

"Well, neither do you." I say shaking my head, "Things happen..." I shrugged a bit, still managing to keep my composure. "You didn't do it.." I said quietly.

[Fitzy Patricks]

It takes everything I've got not to contradict him on the first point, and the outright lie is more than I can stand.
"Yes I did," I say evenly, looking up but fists still clenched. "Actually, I did. I killed her, all right? It came down to me or her and I picked her 'cause I'm not dying. Unless you'd like to kill me, though I'm not going to just stand here if you try."
Clearly at this point I've lost it, but at the same time it's a relief to actually say it. I laugh slightly.

[Riley Pearson]

I looked up at him, thinking I heard him wrong. I really didn't think that he would do that. I stared blankly at him and as he confirmed that I heard him right, I was taken aback and found myself standing up and walking a few steps closer to him. Not really taking any notice to whether it was smart or not.
"You.. you?!" I asked yelling slightly now, becoming angry and upset at him, having a hard time believing it. Feeling more anger as I hear him laugh. "Why're you laughing!?" I asked him loudly, wanting to pull my wand out, but holding back for the moment, doing my best to keep away from him. Not knowing what to do.

[Fitzy Patricks]

Okay, this was not your most brilliant move, I think, eying him warily as he approaches and automatically reaching for my wand.
But I also can't quite stifle the mildly hysterical laughter, or really quite bring myself to be actually scared by this situation. So I hesitate and just stand there instead, inadvertently grinning at him as I shake my head.

((Methinks that he has cracked.... ))